["Mary Had a Little Lamb" dial]
[ring]
[ring]
[click]
[Gift of Gab:] Hello?
[LB:] 'Sup, man?
[GG:] Chillin'
[LB:] Yea?
[GG:] Yea, 'fin (?) to write these lyrics down. What's going on with you?
[LB:] Man... Nothing. Just... Whatever, dude
[GG:] Well why, w-wsup wsup?
[LB:] Nothing man. Just hella stressed out about certain shit right now
Man, it's hella personal shit going down
[GG:] Wow, like that?
[LB:] Yea, man, it's kinda fast
One 'a those moments where, like, I don't feel like I have control over my
life, and all the checks that were supposed to arrive didn't
There's hella politics now in my social life over some bullshit somebody had
told sombody
[GG:] Daaamn
[LB:] Yea, man. So, you know, I shouldn't even 'of told you that
Man, I shouldn't even unload like that
[GG:] Maaan
[LB:] I know. it's just one 'a those moments in time where everything coincides
and it comes together at once and then it all collides
[GG:] Man, I feel that though
[LB:] Anyway, what's goin' on witchu?
[GG:] Aw, man *beep*, just tryin' to do it. Hold on, man, somebody's on my other
line. Imma hit chu right back, aiite?
[LB:] (Coo)
[click]
[Telemarketer:] We wanna talk to you (hoo)
[GG:] I don't wanna talk right now. I'm on the other line. I'm busy
[TM:] We wanna talk to you
[GG:] I said I don't wanna talk right now. w-
[TM:] But we wanna talk to you (hoo ooo ooo)
[GG:] I don't wanna talk right now!
[TM:] We wanna talk to you
[GG:] (Damn). I'm hangin' up. I'm hangin' up. BYE
[click]
[GG:] Hey yo, I'm back, man
[LB:] Cool, man. 'Sup with it?
[GG:] Really, just trying not to think so much
[LB:] Mmm
[GG:] 'n keep my feet up. Make this boy still (?). Stopped smokin' cigarettes
Butts not stinking up my room. Feelin' I've this new diet
[LB:] Word?
[GG:] Really just trying to get my health right. Feelin' I'm just like this crap
coolin' out. Writin' raps. Chillin'- Chillin'
[LB:] Uhn
[GG:] Feel me?
[LB:] I feel it. I feel- Wait, man. You stopped smoking all those Marlboros?
[GG:] Yep
[LB:] How long ago, man? I'm proud of you, bro
[GG:] Man, four weeks. I ain't trippin', though, s'all good. Four weeks
Yo, man, you know me, (homie)
[LB:] Aw, you really think you smoke more phillies since you quit and them
millions of little Virginia Slims?
[GG:] Originally I was smokin' more of them anyway. Really rememberin' back to
when I wasn't really into them since. They was killin' me, though
so I had to get rid of 'em
Anyway, whatchu gettin' into this wednesday, bro?
[GG:] Wednesday... [snap]
Let me think... [snap]
Was that the fifteenth? [snap]
Well see, the rent's paid. [snap]
Got the Net's game- [beep]
Hold on, my shit's ringing
[click]
[TM:] We wanna talk to you (hoo)
[LB:] Ah...shii..
[TM:] We wanna talk to you
[LB:] I don- I don't- I don't wanna talk to you, though
[TM:] But we wanna talk to you (hoo ooo ooo)
[LB:] Fuck this!
[TM:] We wanna talk to you
[LB:] Aite, check this out? I'm about to hang up on youuuu
[click]
[LB:] Alright, I'm back, man
[GG:] Hey, who was that, man?
[LB:] Fuckin' telemarketers callin' my apartment offerin' nothing, botherin' me
constantly, (man)
[GG:] Yea, always just stalkin' cats. There should be laws against this nonsense
[LB:] First of all, what kind of a person gets involved with these vermin making
service calls?
[GG:] "Can I call you by your first name, Tom?"
Man, that ain't workin' *beep*
Wait, hold on, that echo again, man. This shit's irkin' me. I'm about to
talk to 'em. Hold on
LB: Naw, fuck that, I'm gone-
[click]
[GG:] Hello?
Gertrude Warner: Hello, am I speaking to the head of the household, sir?
[GG:] No
[GW:] Perfect. My name is Gertrude Warner, and I've got some super news!
[GG:] This isn't a good time
[GW:] Sure it is. We understand you may be feeling a little nervous
[GG:] Nah uh
[GW:] Now, we could send a representative right out
[GG:] I don't really need anything at this time
[GW:] Oh, I doubt that. Anyway, your address is two two four-
[GG:] No!
[GW:] Yes, I know, too. Is evening time better for you or is daytime?
[GG:] No time at-
[GW:] Perfect! You deserve only the best service. First thing thursday, then
[GG:] No!
[GW:] Perfect. Eight thirty it is, you early bird
Now, my supervisor will be calling you back to confirm this purchase
[GG:] I DIDN'T AGREE TO NOTHIN'!
[GW:] Certainly
This is Gertrude Warner, your (GG: The fuck??) courtesy clerk, saying
goodbye and thank you for choosing us, sir
[click]
[dial tone]
[GG:] ...Wha??
[click]
[GG:] Yo, LB? LB?
[TM:] We wanna talk to you (hoo)
[GG:] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
TM: We wanna talk to you
TM: But we wanna talk to you (hoo ooo ooo)
TM: We wanna talk to you- talk to you- talk to you-
[click]
[dial tone]
[Sample:] If you'd like to make a call, please hang up- please hang up, and try
again. [x2]
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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