Let's see if Philip can
Be a little gentleman
Let's see if Philip's able
To sit at the table

Mama bades Phil behave
And papa he looks very grave
But fidgety Phil he won't sit still
He wriggles and he giggles

Yeah fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil

Well I declare
He rocks backwards and forwards on his chair
Just like it was a rocking horse
Mama's getting very cross

Yeah fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil

Then to make matters worse again
He grabs the tablecloth and then
With knives plates forks spoons and all

Mama pulls such a face
At Philip's sad disgrace
And papa pulls such a frown
As Philip goes tumbling down

Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil

Where is Philip where is he
Oh there he is and he bleeds
There's a bloodstained tablecloth lying on him
Knives and forks they're all stuck in him

There's a knife and there's a fork
Oh Philip this is cruel work
What a terrible to-do
Philip bleeds to death and turns blue

fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil
Fidgety fidgety fidgety Phil