Parody of "How Do You Like Me Now" by Toby Keith (Toby Keith/Chuck Cannon) Tokeco Tunes/Wacissa River Music (admin. by MRBI) (BMI)

New lyrics by Cledus T. Judd/Chris Clark, Cledus Crap Anthems (SESAC)/Of Music, Inc. (SESAC)



Yeah I was always the lazy one, 

A Southern Californian, 

But I've got some kinfolk on the Mason-Dixon line. 

So this summer just for fun 

Hopped in my DeLorean 

And headed for my uncle's farm for a short time. 



I thought that I would be huntin' and fishin'. 

I misunderstood him somehow. 

So far there's nothin' but chores here to mention. 

I didn't mind feedin the sows. 



But HOW DO YOU MILK A COW?

How do you milk a cow? 

I wasn't in FFA. 

This cow must think i'm crazy 

Up under it this way. 

I'm sittin' here a pullin', but there ain't nothin' comin' out. 

Oh E I E I O…

How do you milk a cow? 



Yeah I love it here in Tennesse, 

But these farmers all make fun of me. 

Can't haul much hay in a tiny sports car. 

So I got myself a 4 wheel drive, 

Learned to spotlight deer at night, 

And I've got shearin' sheep right down to an art. 



One thing's for sure, 

I hate shovelin' manure, 

It gets all over my overalls. 

Them horses need shoein' 

I hear Bessie mooin'. 

So I thought maybe I'd ask you all. 



HOW DO YOU MILK A COW? 

How do you milk a cow? 

I think it's safe to say

A man could get arrested for this in LA 

This heifer must be empty 'cause she ain't puttin out. 

Oh E I E I O, 

Tell me how do you milk a cow. 



(Spoken)

This song is absolutely an "udder" disaster. 

I hope I don't get mad cow diease.



How do you milk a cow? 

I no longer care. 

I'm gettin sick and tired of smellin' dairy air. 

I'm headin' back to Cali 

And I'm turnin' in my plow. 

Oh E I E I O. 

How do you milk a cow?